Posted on 8/12/122 by Dan Moreland


By Dan Moreland

We start with Darby Allin and Brody King who greet the Big
Bang Theory dork audience and TBS executives who want to
see what is on their network with a blood feast within one
minute in a coffin match. How is anyone going to top this if
its the first match? Brody cant set up a second table
because its more important to re-enact Engineering
Catastrophes on AEW than the actual match. Ill give him
credit for throwing the table away rather than trying to
push the boulder up the hill, at least.

Look, look the lights go dark again, and guess who it is?
Mordecai Black and Buddy Matthews, who take half the show
trying to destroy Darby. I was so distracted by how
ridiculous this is I didnt pick up on that Sting!!!!! was
in the coffin. Buddy, who is twice the size and 1/3 the age
of Sting!!!!!! is so scared and shaken of a 65 year old man
that instead of beating down on The Icon as soon as he saw
him the coffin, he stood back, and allowed Sting!!!!!! to
slowly stand up and then hit him with a bat.

All that said a somewhat creative finish with Allin hanging
King with a chain long enough (and trust me in real life it
only takes seconds) to pass him out and make him stumble
into the coffin for the win. Again Brody can go and has a
good look and Darby is great playing off much bigger men.
But the bad outweighed the good in the opener. And after all
that blood and violence, Taz giggles on color.

Oh no Mox with another promo. If you could transport him
back into the 1970s and shaved his head he might have made a
good German or Russian heel. So Chris Jerichos Gimmick of
the Week is Lionheart.

The AEW Six Man tournament is announced. Tony Khan sure
loves his tournaments. At some point, the planet is going to
run out of precious metals from all these title belts.

We follow one gimmick match with ANOTHER, this time its the
Tornado match between the Luchas and Andrade and Roooooosh,
wearing Los Ingobernales tee shirts which Excalibur mentions
without giving ANY background or backstory on that faction
or what it means. This was another predictable Lucha
Brothers match, also I noticed the fans were dead quiet
until there was a highspot. In other words, the fans were
here for a stunt show. Note this fan reaction versus another
match later in the night.

How many times will Penta have his mask tied to the ring
ropes before he learns having a tassel on the back of it is
a bad idea? And are we supposed to be ALL that horrified
when he loses his mask if his face is painted too and we
still dont know what he looks like? Has there been a match
when the Luchas lost without someone taking off their mask?
And why are teams wrestling a 2 man tag team match to
qualify for a trios tournament? Yeah, that IS a lot of
questions and I think they are all fair.

Imagine its 1981 Mid-South TV and Ted DiBiase and Paul
Orndorff approach JYD, surrounded by jobber friends, and
emote how bad they feel for being heels, and please JYD,
would you set that aside and join us to be a six man tag
team? JYD in turn, hems and haws and finally says, no
fellas, Im loyal to Sonny King, Mike Boyette, and Mike
Hudspeth, sorry. In turn Ted and Paul sulk off with sour

Cant imagine that? Well thats just whet you saw in that
Young Bucks-Millennial Cowboy Adam Page segment. Except,
none of them are Ted DiBiase, Paul Orndorff or JYD, and the
angle would have ended up with the entire backstage being
torn up, Bill Watts would have knocked all three guys upside
their heads if they came up with it, and most likely, Ted
DiBiase, Paul Orndorff and JYD would have kicked the shit
out of Bill Watts if he ever asked them to do it.

But its 2022 and wrestling is all about feelings,
emoting, and guilt. Im sorry for yelling at clouds but
the wrestling I grew up on was about highly athletic looking
over the top men who looked like they could tear a bar apart
fighting over money, titles, pride, women, and personal
grudges. It was dangerous and you were convinced these guys
could kick your ass. Hell, I even thought Moolah could beat
my ass. Now, I have no question I could beat the crap out of
this AEW roster and Im 54.

Where were we?

Luchasaurus is next and gets zero reaction from the fans
because they are confused as to whether he is a face or a
heel thanks to weeks of botched booking. I know a lot of
fans are saying AEW is hurting because CM Punk and Bryan
Danielson are injured. Fair enough. But this entire
Christian-Luchasaurus-Jungle Boy deal is like an alley oop
to Ben Simmons, and just like Ben Simmons, Tony passes
instead of taking the easy dunk. I forgot who Lucha wrestled
but he had a manager, which begs the question---when do
complete jobbers get managers?

After the match Christian is in the back making not-so-
Christian comments. Saurus and Jungle Boy go to the back to
get him, but destroy a bunch of security instead. As Jungle
Boy goes to find Christian, he tells Lucha to check on the
security he just destroyed.

Imagine its Mid-South in 1983, and Hacksaw Duggan and Kamala
just wiped out backstage security, and Hacksaw tells Kamala
to check on . . . .ahhhhh whats the use?

What a bizarre promo with Miro and Julia Hart. I like Miro
but the payoff to whatever they are trying to do is taking
fooooooreeeeeever . . . ..

Why would Hobbs joins a bunch of losers like The Factory?
Where does Nick Kamarato get his costume, Party City?
Kamarato is reminding me more and more of a 1980s Scott
Hall. Not from a performance standpoint, but just this big
hairy muscular guy who can go and has a look that cant find
a gimmick.

Jay Lethal and the two Indians come out, and here comes
Wardlow. They square up, and here comes FTR to a tremendous
ovation. There was some idea for an angle here but something
went wrong as it pertains to Sonjay Dutts participation and
he truly looked pissed about whatever it was that went
wrong. Welcome to AEW, Sonjay! A $50 million promotion that
is out of staples back at the office. At the end of the day,
this all went over like a lead balloon though I guess I
cant say Wardlow pairing with FTR is a bad thing . .

If Anna Jay chokes out a man, OK I cant expect JAS to help
the guy. On a woman? It makes her look more dangerous if
they pull her off.

During intro for the Aaron Salow v Ricky Starks match, The
Factory stands there and lets Ricky take the bow, but dont
do anything about it. That was odd. Ricky doesnt get QUITE
get the reaction he should get because his face turn was
ruined. Aaaron Salow has the same exact skinny physique he
had 2 years ago. The kid has a great look but still cant
seem to break out of the jobber role he has apparently
assumed and accepted. After the match, Starks runs away from
the Factory into the audience, which is a heel move. In the
meantime Hobbs breaks a TV and we STILL dont know what his
beef is with Starks.

Comedy from the Gunns, Stokely, and Danhausen. It was quick.

Orange Cassidy and Best Friends are doing something stupid
backstage, as usual, when Ringo Starr shows up with two
wrestlers we have never seen or heard of. How many roster
members does this company have anyway?

Madison Rayne is next, versus someone who finally knows how
to carry herself like a star, Jade Cargill. Cargills win is
followed up by an Athena run in, yuck.

I was going to swear off Rampage after a year because its
such a waste of time, but of course Hook and Bryan Danielson
are scheduled so I must watch it now. Dammit!

They set up the battle of the tag team partners for the
world womens title between Thunderosa v Toni Storm with the
most boring, uninspired, low energy face to face promo ever.

Chris Jericho comes out with his Gimmick of the Week,
Lionheart. I get that, but then the fans get screwed out
of singing along to Judas, which is one of the few things
left of interest for the fans as it pertains to Chris
Jericho. 1000 fans in the arena care about who Lionheart
was. 800,000 fans watching on TBS want to sing Judas.

If you can aside this idiocy and understand why Jericho was
wrestling why he was (a callback to his style in the mid-
90s) and get over all the unnecessary blood, this was one
helluva mat match. They play up Jericho ripping Moxs
earrings out, though they were obviously open. But it also
makes Mox look like an in idiot for wearing jewelry to the
ring in the first place.

Jericho decided this week to work his ass off, and the Walls
of Jericho spots were dramatic and awesome. Note how the
fans were more into this than the breaks between the Lucha
Brothers high spots. Yes, the images of a bloodied Mox
trying to get out of a leg submission move was reminiscent
of Hart-Austin, and dont think that was an accident.

Only downer was Sami throwing in Floyd to Jericho from the
crowd even though Jericho was ahead, and the spot was shot
ala amatuer.

Mox wins and keeps the Interim title, but here comes JAS,
then Blackpool Fight Club, a schmaaze breaks out and then
the music plays, its CM Punk and the crowd goes diaper as he

Show finishes with a belly to belly, face to face between
Punk and Mox, and the crowd loves it and thats how it ends.

Not a great show, but an entertaining one but with lots of
bad booking. I always said a main event can save a show, and
while flawed, here it did with guess what? WRESTLING. VERY
VERY GOOD mat wrestling. When all fails and you cant out
together a decent undercard, make sure you put together a
great main event and while I would hesitate to say great
very very good is good enough to give this show a slight
thumbs up.

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